Preacher’s wives in the Church of Christ often navigate a unique, demanding role that combines supporting their husband’s ministry with high, sometimes unspoken, expectations from the congregation. While not holding an official office, they are often viewed as partners in ministry, acting as confidants, offering counsel to women, and creating stability, while frequently moving every 3-5 years. Their role centers on being a faithful Christian wife, often requiring them to balance with grace, the pressures of a public life with the need for personal, authentic relationships.
One of the key aspects of the role is support and partnership. The role is to be a faithful wife and partner, aiding their husband’s ministry through encouragement and prayer. In facing unspoken expectations, they may face pressure to function as a “FIRST LADY” or to be involved in all aspects to church life, often to be a need for boundaries. Many are actively involved in teaching, mentoring, or organizing, but their involvement should be based on their own talents and desires, not just the title. Regarding mobility and sacrifice, preacher’s wives often move frequently, requiring them to constantly adapt, rebuild, and create a stable, loving home in new environments.
Due to public scrutiny their lives, and the lives of their children, are often under observation. As a result of this, they often face an emotional labor as they also manage the stress of their husband’s workload, including difficult church situations or personal attacks, with minimal opportunity to vent.
Preacher’s wives have their own identity beyond the role. Involved in this is an individual role with her own spiritual journey, and not merely an extension of her husband’s ministry. They, by no means, are flawless, not the church’s servant, and should not be held to a different standard than other Christian women. There is no specific Biblical “job description” for a preacher’s wife: her role should be tailored to her gifts.
After decades of preaching and now in retirement, my wife is still a preacher’s wife. With her having fulfilled all of the above, and often beyond, has made my ministry what it was in full time preaching and continues during my retirement. When I say above and beyond, I have reference to the time while visiting a Christian couple, her with cancer, with no chair to be found to set on, my wife pulled up a “potty chair” by her bed so the two of them could talk while her husband and I had conversation in the living room. If a burial was on a hill side, she was standing with me by the grave site. If a brother or sister was dying in the hospital, she was with me holding their hands while their souls were released from the body.
I’m thankful for my “Preacher’s Wife” that has been just that throughout the years of preaching God’s Word!
Onward Rejoicing,
John B. Daniels, Associate Minister
